Find out
which of the four
attachment styles
you have.

Twelve statements, four minutes, free. Afterwards you know which style is running in your relationships and which step changes something first. For the two insecure styles there is a workbook for CHF 19.

Question 01 of 12 No sign-up

When someone I care about doesn't reply to my message, I start to worry.

1 2 3 4 5
Does not applyApplies exactly
Free · 12 questions · about 4 minutes Answers stay in your browser Workbook CHF 19 · optional

The test measures two values,
and they give you your style

Attachment style and attachment type mean the same thing. Since the nineties, attachment research has worked with two independent dimensions. Where you sit on both decides which of the four fields you land in.

  • Attachment anxietyHow much it occupies you whether the other person will stay. A high value means the alarm goes off early.
  • Attachment avoidanceHow much you create distance when things get close. A high value means you handle strain by yourself.

Both values can shift. Your style says where you stand today.

The four attachment styles

Most people recognise themselves mainly in one, with parts of a second. Anyone high on both insecure scales has a style of their own, the fourth.

Securely attached

Asking for help and being alone are both possible. Conflict is uncomfortable but not threatening. The underlying assumption is: I am allowed to need something, and the other person stays anyway.

Anxiety low · Avoidance low

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Anxiously attached

Ambiguity is hard to sit with, so you ask and you check. From outside it looks like too much. From inside it is an attempt to get the ground back under your feet.

Anxiety high · Avoidance low

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Avoidantly attached

Strain gets handled alone. That reads as cool, and measurements on the body show something else: tension rises while the account stays calm. So the feelings are not missing. They are kept out of awareness, because that is cheaper than disappointment.

Anxiety low · Avoidance high

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Anxious and avoidant

Closeness is a wish and a warning at the same time, and both are strong. This style is more often connected with neglect and violence than the other three. If you recognise yourself here, a professional is a better address than a self-test.

Anxiety high · Avoidance high

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Two workbooks, CHF 19 each

Twelve chapters, a twelve-week plan, 36 sources with effect sizes. Every chapter ends with a task for that same week and with a section on what it cannot do.

Both workbooks are written in German. An English edition is in preparation. The test, this website and the support are in English, the PDF is not. Please only buy it if you read German.

Cover, chapter 01 and the weekly plan · tap to enlarge

Warten, ohne zu kontrollieren.

For anxious attachment · 32 pages · German

  • Trigger log: fourteen days of measuring instead of guessing
  • The gap between the cue and the reaction
  • The phone, the best documented single lever
  • Why self-image shifts more than reassurance
PDF · CHF 19

Cover, chapter 01 and the weekly plan · tap to enlarge

Bleiben, ohne dichtzumachen.

For avoidant attachment · 32 pages · German

  • Withdrawal log: the body signal as an early warning
  • The sentence that replaces walking away
  • What suppression costs, with the numbers
  • Small dependencies that turn out well
PDF · CHF 19
The workbooks make no diagnosis, because attachment style appears in no diagnostic manual. They also replace no therapy: a PDF cannot respond to you, and responding is the active ingredient. Nothing is promised here either. The research shows that attachment anxiety can decrease, not that it will decrease for you.

Where the numbers come from

Every number in the workbooks has a source number. Where one is missing, it is missing on purpose, because I did not find one.

36Studies and books
1969Up to 2025, with effect sizes
12Chapters, readable alone
20Minutes per week

The test here is a short form with twelve statements. The detailed instrument used in research is the ECR-R, freely available through the materials page of R. Chris Fraley at the University of Illinois.

Common questions

How accurate is a test with twelve statements?
It places you in a style and shows a direction, not an exact value. Self-report also has a known weakness: it captures what you think about yourself. With avoidant patterns in particular, your own estimate is often off, because the pattern consists precisely of not registering strain.
Can you be between two styles?
Yes, and the fourth style is exactly that: high on both scales. On top of that, the same person shows different amounts of it in different relationships: anxious with a partner, relaxed with friends.
Are my parents to blame?
The model describes interactions, not blame. Involved are the child's temperament, the load on the parents, the surroundings, and events nobody had control over.
How does psychotherapy work in Switzerland?
Since 1 July 2022, basic insurance covers psychological psychotherapy on a doctor's referral. The way in is through your GP, and one sentence is enough there. Fifteen sessions are provided per referral, after which an extension is possible, and from the 30th session with the insurer's approval. You pay the deductible and the coinsurance yourself. Check that the practitioner has a cantonal licence, otherwise billing through basic insurance is not possible. Waiting lists are real, and several parallel enquiries are normal.
What happens to my answers?
The twelve answers stay in your browser. They are not sent to the server and not stored, and if you reload the page they are gone. What is counted is only which question people stop at and which of the four results comes out, with no cookie and no IP address, so I can see where this site does not work. Buying requires an email address for delivering the PDF. All of it is written down in the privacy notice.
What if my style is «securely attached»?
Then you need neither workbook, and the result says so. Both are written for the insecure styles.
Are the workbooks available in English?
Not yet. Both are written in German, and an English edition is in preparation. Everything on this site is in English, the PDF is not. If you do not read German, it is better to wait, and a refund is not possible afterwards.
Can I undo a purchase?
No. A PDF is downloaded before a return could be processed, so the purchase is final. What you get instead: three pages from each workbook are shown above, and the test tells you beforehand which one fits you. If your result is «securely attached», it says there that you need none. And if something goes wrong technically, a link does not work or the mail never arrives, that gets fixed until the workbook reaches you. The conditions are in the terms.

If it is acute,
do not wait for
a test result

If you are in a very bad place right now, a questionnaire is the wrong tool. These Swiss numbers are staffed around the clock.

143Die Dargebotene Hand. Anonymous, free, also chat and email via 143.ch. Counselling in English is available. 147Pro Juventute, for children and young people 144Acute danger to yourself or others
OpferhilfeCantonal counselling centres in cases of violence. Free and independent of any police report
Securely Attached

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